Cougar Hunting

One Friday after an Aggie baseball game, Michael, Meg, our friend Lauren/Muscles/Staffenfection, and I go out to this club called Rockies. None of us had ever heard of it, but Lauren said a coworker thought it was “pretty fun to hang out.” So we thought we’d give it the old college try and loaded up in my truck and headed that way.

When we got there the parking lot was pretty full and we were really excited about it. How could we not have heard of this place? This place is packed! We soon found out why.

We walking into the place that smelled like Aqua Velva and Old Spice. Not the Old Spice of today like Swagger, but the Old Spice that dads wore back in the day. We had just walked into a time machine/”Cougar Bar.” Lauren has taken us to a dang Cougar Bar. Rather than leave because we were the youngest people there, we decided to make the most of it.

We got a drink and we watched people our parents age “getting down” (whatever that means). We danced a few songs and were just enjoying the night until the girls left to go to the bathroom. Michael and I then noticed some ladies looking at us. The cougars had their prey in their sites.

They come sit down at our table and start talking to us. First it’s innocent, but then it turns naughty. Very naughty. The things that they were saying to us would make a deaf man blush.

Michael gave me look that I can only describe as pure terror and the only thing I could think was these women can smell fear.

What had seemed like an eternity ended with the girls coming back to our table and dragging us back out on the dance floor. I told Meg that I wanted to go home and burn my clothes because I was hit on by a woman my mother’s age.

Michael had a breakdown and cried on the ride home.

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One response to “Cougar Hunting

  1. Pingback: Staffen Proved Why Women Can’t Play Video Games « Jaybird is the Word·

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