Shakespeare of Lies

I knew a guy in college that was a compulsive liar. This guy would tell a lie even when it was easier to tell the truth. Now, a lot people get annoyed by this personality because they try to catch them in their lies. That’s a losing battle because the compulsive liar will invent new lies to cover up the previously lie they just told. Reality is just not an issue in their head. The best thing you could do is believe every lie they tell, that builds their confidence up a little bit, and their lies get better. Ask leading questions that you want to story to go. These people are “build your own adventure” stories come to life.

Anyway, back to the guy. This guy was like a Shakespeare of lies. I was amazed at the stuff that he would come up with in a story. I loved asking him things that I knew he could never do in real life to see what kind of adventure he would take me on. Knowing that he didn’t go play golf the day before, I’d ask, “Hey man how was your golf game?”

“Uhhhh……it was good. Really good. Shot a 70. That’s -2.”

That’s phenomenal. That’s the best you’ve ever shot. You must have been on fire.

“Eh. I’ve played way better that that before. I really struggled out there,” he said as he leaned in closer with more direct eye contact. He always did that. It’s as if his body was saying, “I dare you to call me on this lie.”

You shot -2 and you called that a struggle? That’s incredible. What happened out there? Couldn’t putt or what?

“I was on the par 5 18th hole, cruising at -13. I was going to set the course record. I just got to my drive of 387. I caught it on the heel. Couldn’t help that, but I’m about 210 out and I pull out my 8-iron…no I pulled my 7-iron because of the wind in my face. I hit the most glorious shot in the world. It was headed straight for the flag and then a bird swooped in and caught the ball in midair. So I dropped another, took my penalty stroke, and hit again. Another bird came and did the same thing. That happened until I said I finally made the ball in the hole for a 16. It was like something off Tin Cup, only better and more believable.”


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